Thursday, December 30, 2010

BABIES

Babies. Do you know them?

Not just any babies, of course. The four stars of the nearly 2 hour documentary called "Babies:" Ponijao, Bayar, Mari and Hattie. We watch them all the time (it streams on Netflix).

ALL THE TIME.

At first it was just a little fun spying in on the lives of other ones--I mean, we even do that in stores! Dia gets so excited every time she even sees a stroller and shouts, "Bebe! Bebe!"

But now, she will sit through the entire nearly 2 hours of the movie. Actually, she stands. She stands at the coffee table (where my laptop sits) and watches, laughs, scrunches her face and calls, "Mama!" (at the interesting stuff) and "Maow!" (at the cats--the universal pet apparently). For nearly 2 hours! (Such an amazing attention span!)

For a family that doesn't "do" television, our babe sure does like documentaries. :)

Isn't it interesting the fascination we have with ourselves, though? We watch Dia's face scan every shot of that film, looking at toys, animals (sometimes an animal will be just out of shot so that she can only see a tail and she'll try to lift up the laptop or turn it to the side to try and see the puppy!), mamas and papas. She absolutely loves it. At Grandma's house she's seen cartoons like Clifford and even live action shows like Yabba Gabba (I think that's the name) and watched it for a few minutes or so. But never, ever has she been so infatuated with someting on a screen. She even asks for it by name: "Mama," (pointing to the laptop), "Babies?" If I smile and nod, she runs over clapping her hands and then holds her hands up as if to say "Where are they?" until the opening credits start. And from then on, she is glued.

To be honest, it all started with watching herself on Youtube. I post all of our videos there for our own record keeping and every once in a while we'll watch through them, all the time she's signing and saying, "More!" Well, one keyword search of "babies" on youtube and the rest is history!

Thankfully, it's made for some great teachable moments--"Oh, no! Did you see him hit Ponijao/Bayar? Ouchie. He/she's crying now. Oh no, that's so sad. Hitting makes us cry, doesn't it, Dia?"

Who knows? Maybe she'll be a filmaker like her Auntie Jess or Uncle Randy! Until then, babies, we're watching (and learning from) you!

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

The Family Who Mays Together...

We typically pray before meals as a family. I'm a little less routine in praying when it's just Dia and me, but still, typically, we say grace. We hold hands (just Rory and me--Dia likes her hands free to eat while we pray) and Rory usually says, "Let's pray." Then, we pray. Nothing big, but we both close our eyes, bow our heads and talk with the Lord, usually with much thanksgiving. We haven't really incorporated Dia, knowing that she will join when she's ready--that's to say, we have never "taught" her to pray or forced it in any way.

Well, the other night, I guess I was a little hungrier than usual and started picking at my plate before Rory had sat down. More noticably, before we had prayed.

Dia seemed agitated and kept squinting her eyes with much emphasis saying, "May! May!" Rory and I looked to each other--what is "May"? Why is she squinting?

She was asking us to pray.

May, my friends. May. In all circumstances, for all reasons, just may. :)

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Confession

I DON"T KNOW HOW TO BE A MOM!

Arghrghrghrgrhg. I watched my mother imperfectly perfectly raise us, so I don't feel like I have many excuses for my ignorance. But I am a different woman than my mom. Dia is a different daughter than I was.

And plus, there's all this stuff that I just DON"T KNOW.

Do you know that my daughter pats the floor next to where she's sitting and grins up at me, saying "Mama!" She's asking me to sit with her and play. Read. Eat. You know, be together.

And do you know that sometimes I say no?!

Don't get me wrong; c'est la vie. BUT I often say no to her and yes to the....dishes?

This is my revelation, my peace to find. When I say only yes to her, then the guilt sets in as she sits in dirt on the floor...vacuum? Play?

Ah, this is not the land of all or nothing. This is life...balance. And more than anything I want to give Dia life. The skills to keep house. The skills to imagine everything. A heart that is heard, loved, valued and secure. In my love, papa's love and Papa's love.

And so I turn back to my Mama...and know the answer lies in starting on my knees, confessing it all and seeking More.

Lord, You know. And You know. And so, You know. Thank You for knowing. Amen.

Friday, December 17, 2010

Friday Night Flights

So I meant to post this LAST Friday night. I was so excited with it that I jumped on right then and there to post this great video when I decided to catch up on blogging in general. But as you can see, I only got a few posts up that night. So, without further adieu, this is what Papa thought up for us to do last Friday night:






Introducing....

...the photography of India June Starks!

She took each of these photos all by herself (as I prayed she didn't she break my camera!). Rory and I are considerably impressed. We see definite talent (in everything she does). :) (The last one looks like a close-up of dog fur, just fyi.)





Friday, December 10, 2010

On Black Friday

We made animal noises....(Puffer fish and elephant hands down are my favorite.)

Oh November....Where did you go?

If I could post just ten minutes of my life with Dia you would instantly understand why my blogging has slacked. (Well, maybe all moms just intuitively know how much more fun it is to live life than blog it.) And by the time she has gone to bed, Rory and I are so desperate to catch up on OUR lives that the computer has been getting a little dusty.

But Ror and Dia are off "making" stuff (I'll post the video last to be chronoligically accurate) so I let the house sit uncleaned to blog.

I have some great pictures from November to catch you up on our fun month:

Ok, so it may not be Christmas morning, but Thanksgiving morning is special, too, right? Plus, she's just so cute in footed pjs!



We had great plans for Black Friday (none of which were shopping!) but I was feeling a little under the weather, so we settled for burgers and fries and then a movie date (just Ror and me). Oh, and talking on our Blackberry.


Auntie Jess is a little like the Papparazzi when it comes to Dia and got some fun shots while she babysat while we went to the movies

Dia-sized St. Nicholas (we are avoiding the Santa Clause name and opting for the more historically-accurate gift-giver while we still have the choice!) at Costco

Dia watching ball-ball (football)--it's her biggest obsession. She laughs when they drop the ball, claps her hands and just stares at all the players. If we go somewhere and she spies it on the tv, she immediately points and runs over shouting "Ball-ball!" It's pretty fun (funny, too!).

Looking up NFL.com with Papa

Decorating the tree...someone got to stand on the coffee table


Could there be a better tree-topper?!


Ornament-hanging with Mama

I am constantly amazed at the mothering instinct in my daughter. She has even pulled off all the ornaments within reach to hug, kiss and put to bed (i.e., laying them down and saying "Shhh"). Here she's sharing yogurt with dollie. :)



Ok, so at the mall a while back, Dia became obsessed with the escalators. "Up, up!" she would exlaim and point over and over until Rory finally held her going up on one. Well, that just fed the addiction! We both took her up and up multiple times. By the second time, she stood on it on her own and started walking up all by herself! (No fear, I tell you.) By the time we left, she was riding it like an amusement ride. :) I love these little joys in life.

In other news, through a series of painful events we discovered Dia has some food allergies, namely wheat, corn and egg (she also tested positive for strawberries, bananas, nectarines, pears and her most favorite food of all, watermelon, but these we can start introducing back into her diet soon). Apparently, according to our naturopaths, diaper rash is not normal. Ever. Anytime urine comes into contact with skin causing it to turn red can mean allergies. So with our already dairy and sugar-free diet, I have had an interesting (read: tear-filled) time finding filling food. Thankfully Rory has taken on the role of Soup Maker Extraordinaire and for the past two Sundays has made a nutritious Dia-safe soup that we can pull out for meals and snacks during the week. I have also become a blog-reading feign trying to find yummy stuff for our Bug. Two blogs I have been relying on for inspiration and recipes are: Spunky Coconut and Sketch-free Vegan Eating. I am so grateful for the two years we spent as raw vegans--Dia loves raw, nut-based cheesecake. It has really helped me with healthy snacks like flax crackers and alternative grains like quinoa and amarinth. Mostly I am just so grateful to still be nursing so I know she is getting lots of nutrients still from that.

We have been laying low, enjoying the weather and our little family. I had been searching endlessly for a meaningful way to celebrate the Christmas season but turns out, having a Christ-centered husband and home makes everything meaningful! From an average Tuesday to a Sunday morning, we are finding Jesus everywhere these days and so I have enjoyed advent stories from others, but we are simply just being us and finding much meaning in it. I have never experienced such a rich Christmas!

And to end this far too long post, lest you think only mamas teach gentleness, watch this:



As we sing with Dia regularly Happy Birthday, Jesus! His big day is almost here....

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Kitcher Up

I hear a soft "moooooo" coming from our room as Rory puts D to sleep. They are animal sound experts these days. Nothing can soothe her like a quick, "D, what does a cat say?" Well, that and singing "Ba Ba Black Sheep." I HAVE to record these things for the blog because they are so fabulous. She sings "Ba ba ba ba" throughout the song and then nods her head for "Yes, sir, Yes, sir three bags full." She also does the hand motions for "Itsy Bitsy Spider" and then, this is hilarious, imitates the sounds while we sing the ABC's and pretends to wash her hands. That would be because I always sing the ABC's when I was my hands (which is ALL the time as a full-time mama)! It's a hygeine thing from when I used to be a server and Dia apparently really enjoys it, too! Say your ABC's, wash your hands. Why not?!

Discipline has also become a new way of life. Our sweet 13-month old turned to me in a store a few weeks back and said AND signed "NO" when I told her she couldn't run around the store. (To be fair, she did ask if she could---tee hee hee!) I was floored. The next day was spent in tears as I was certain our angel would be caught shoplifting in no time and then imprisoned by 15. Ok, so I can work on the drama on my part, but still, I was horrified! I have heard of the terrible two's, but I did not expect the indignant 13 months! I am often caught off-guard by her intelligence--she is quick. Thankfully, though, I am aware of this and after an afternoon of one time-out after another, this girl obeyed my voice at the first sound. This was fabulous. I found freedom as her mom because I didn't have to lose my cool--the choice was hers. Go into the breakables store (herb store full of teeny tiny fun colored glass tincture bottles), sit on your bottom. (I literally picked her up, took her away from the store and her friends who were out playing with us and sat her on her bottom, explaining my actions as I went. She got up, as to be expected, and I just sat her back down until she could sit there on her bottom for ten seconds. Then I'd smile and say, "Would you like to try again?" To which she would nod and grin emphatically. Seriously--13 MONTHS OLD.) Run away from mom passed the corner to which she specifically told you not, sit on your bottom. (Repeat previous scenario.) Now, a few weeks after the initial time-out, if she misbehaves I can simply turn to her and say "Sit on your bottom, Dia. Mama told you No and you didn't listen," and she will sit right down on her bottom. In fact, I've had to extend the length of the time-out to 20 seconds of solid bottom-sitting. If she gets up before 20 seconds, I start back at 1.

Now, people have given me bizzarre looks as I sit this sweet blonde baby of an angel down for a time-out. I'll admit, it looks kind of funny (read "crazy"). But she is smart. Smarter than her age and this simple action and consequence scenario has worked for us. It may even seem extreme to some parents (and non-parents alike), but I know that laying a foundation of boundaries with someone as fun-loving as my daughter will hopefully pave the way for our long-term, mutually respectful relationship.

I can't tell you how quickly I began to resent her when she misbehaved in that store that first time when she signed and told me "No." I really started to look at her differently and ask myself what happened to my baby. I started to fear what has happening to our loving relationship. After the first successful time-out, though, I ecstatically called Rory to brag about our "good listener." Setting clear boundaries for Dia (with clear consequences) completely freed me! And her! I do not have to raise my voice, lose my temper, lose control (the choice to obey is hers--it is not mine to make her obey), repeat myself or demand things of her she cannot deliver (i.e., angelic behavior at all times). It's been almost a month now, though, and I know that we will continue to have to stay one step ahead of her. (For example, the other day I was spraying her diaper off in the toilet when she got close and I could see her curiousity. She really wanted to touch the toilet but it was just too dirty for me, so I told her not to touch it. She held up her finger, thought about it, and then touched it. I smiled inside (I totally get it--sometimes you just gotta do it!) but then turned her and said, "Dia" and she sat on her bottom. Action, consequence.)

Anyway, we are growing quickly over here. She picks up new words and new signs every day (my sister always laughs outloud whenever Dia grunts and I tell her to use her words! But she knows them and they help us communicate so much). And loves loves loves people. We went to the park a few days back with a friend and Dia walked right over to a brother and sister we had never met. (They were about 3 and 4 years old.) She just sat right down in the sand with them and smiled and started playing! Only slightly hesitant, they eventually incorporated her into their play. More kids (older ones) joined eventually and at one point an older boy took her shovel. I didn't want to interfere (it seemed like as good a time as any to let her see that life isn't always fair) but even before I could if I had wanted to, my little baby poked him in the face! She scrunched up her face and let him know not to mess with her. He was easily three or four years older than her! I just that one play itself out in the sandbox.

We also have a few neighbor kids whom she adores. They also are older and ride scooters and play basketball like the awesome people they are and Dia just joins in either by watching or walking along with them or waving her hands around and clapping. This exquisite creation knows no shyness (wait til I post the video of her walking around the entire Sizzler waving and grinning at each table and at one point even pointing her finger at some guys as if to say, "Right back atcha' man!"), no fear (yes, I have a video of her bungee jumping off of her dad--you'll have to see it to get it), nothing she can't do. I just love that! It makes for some interesting disciplining (as exaplained above), but as my mom always says, "You're not raising a child. You're raising an adult. And the traits you'll love in her as an adult are the hardest as a child."

I wish I had pictures! I have them, but they are in said bedroom and my walking in could easily foil papa's get-to-sleep techniques. So this random catch-up will have to do.

As my friend closed out her blog recently,

"He threw himself at Jesus' feet and thanked Him" (Luke 17:16a) May we do the same."

In gratitude and peaceful contentment, Happy Thanksgiving, friends!

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Hi hi hi! So sorry I haven't posted in a while--I am a working on a new project that has been monopolizing my free time. It's super exciting, though. It's a four-letter project that starts with "B" and ends with...."g". If you were gonna say "y" then you do not know me at all! :) I'll post more details ASAP. Super super exciting!

Today, though, we went up north to enjoy the cold weather....

FYI everyone should own a pink parka!




Saturday, October 23, 2010

Principles of Education

Don't you think so, too??????

1. Children are born persons.

2. They are not born either good or bad, but with possibilities for good and for evil. (*My personal note here--this is not in reference to sin nature which we are all born with, but rather capacity to choose good or evil. Complete conformity to Christ and submission to the Holy Spirit are our only hopes! And even then, we can only say hallelujah for His grace and mercy.)

3. The principles of authority on the one hand, and of obedience on the other, are natural, necessary and fundamental; but––

4. These principles are limited by the respect due to the personality of children, which must not be encroached upon whether by the direct use of fear or love, suggestion or influence, or by undue play upon any one natural desire.

5. Therefore, we are limited to three educational instruments––the atmosphere of environment, the discipline of habit, and the presentation of living ideas. The P.N.E.U. Motto is: "Education is an atmosphere, a discipline, and a life."

6. When we say that "education is an atmosphere," we do not mean that a child should be isolated in what may be called a 'child-environment' especially adapted and prepared, but that we should take into account the educational value of his natural home atmosphere, both as regards persons and things, and should let him live freely among his proper conditions. It stultifies a child to bring down his world to the child's' level.

7. By "education is a discipline," we mean the discipline of habits, formed definitely and thoughtfully, whether habits of mind or body. Physiologists tell us of the adaptation of brain structures to habitual lines of thought, i.e., to our habits.

8. In saying that "education is a life," the need of intellectual and moral as well as of physical sustenance is implied. The mind feeds on ideas, and therefore children should have a generous curriculum.

9. We hold that the child's mind is no mere sac to hold ideas; but is rather, if the figure may be allowed, a spiritual organism, with an appetite for all knowledge. This is its proper diet, with which it is prepared to deal; and which it can digest and assimilate as the body does foodstuffs.

10.Such a doctrine as e.g. the Herbartian, that the mind is a receptacle, lays the stress of education (the preparation of knowledge in enticing morsels duly ordered) upon the teacher. Children taught on this principle are in danger of receiving much teaching with little knowledge; and the teacher's axiom is,' what a child learns matters less than how he learns it."

11. But we, believing that the normal child has powers of mind which fit him to deal with all knowledge proper to him, give him a full and generous curriculum; taking care only that all knowledge offered him is vital, that is, that facts are not presented without their informing ideas. Out of this conception comes our principle that,––

12. "Education is the Science of Relations"; that is, that a child has natural relations with a vast number of things and thoughts: so we train him upon physical exercises, nature lore, handicrafts, science and art, and upon many living books, for we know that our business is not to teach him all about anything, but to help him to make valid as many as may be of––
  • "Those first-born affinities
  • "That fit our new existence to existing things."
13. In devising a SYLLABUS for a normal child, of whatever social class, three points must be considered:
  • He requires much knowledge, for the mind needs sufficient food as much as does the body.
  • The knowledge should be various, for sameness in mental diet does not create appetite (i.e., curiosity)
  • Knowledge should be communicated in well-chosen language, because his attention responds naturally to what is conveyed in literary form.
14. As knowledge is not assimilated until it is reproduced, children should 'tell back' after a single reading or hearing: orshould write on some part of what they have read.

13. A single reading is insisted on, because children have naturally great power of attention; but this force is dissipated by the re-reading of passages, and also, by questioning, summarising. and the like.
  • Acting upon these and some other points in the behaviour of mind, we find that the educability of children is enormously greater than has hitherto been supposed, and is but little dependent on such circumstances as heredity and environment.
  • Nor is the accuracy of this statement limited to clever children or to children of the educated classes: thousands of children in Elementary Schools respond freely to this method, which is based on the behaviour of mind.
14. There are two guides to moral and intellectual self-management to offer to children, which we may call 'the way of the 'will' and 'the way of the reason.'

15. The way of the will: Children should be taught,
  • To distinguish between 'I want' and 'I will.'
  • That the way to will effectively is to turn our thoughts from that which we desire but do not will.
  • That the best way to turn our thoughts is to think of or do some quite different thing, entertaining or interesting.
  • That after a little rest in this way, the will returns to its work with new vigour.
18. The way of reason: We teach children, too, not to 'lean (too confidently) to their own understanding'; because the function of reason is to give logical demonstration
  • of mathematical truth,
  • of an initial idea, accepted by the will.
In the former case, reason is, practically, an infallible guide, but in the latter, it is not always a safe one; for, whether that idea be right or wrong, reason will confirm it by irrefragable proofs.

19. Therefore, children should be taught, as they become mature enough to understand such teaching, that the chief responsibility which rests on them as persons is the acceptance or rejection of ideas. To help them in this choice we give them principles of conduct, and a wide range of the knowledge fitted to them. These principles should save children from some of the loose thinking and heedless action which cause most of us to live at a lower level than we need.

20. We allow no separation to grow up between the intellectual and 'spiritual' life of children, but teach them that the Divine Spirit has constant access to their spirits, and is their Continual Helper in all the interests, duties and joys of life.


If you made it this far, congratulations! It is a lot to process. Especially in this 19th/18th century language. These are the principles of Charlotte Mason (can't believe I just linked you to wikipedia--ugh!)--a dynamic educator from the late 1800's who fought against the evils of passive education that was prevalent in schools even back then. Her work laid the foundation for much of our educational system today. But, without nourishing their spiritual life and giving education a sole purpose of making kids rich (seems anymore that college is only good to make us rich, not nourish our minds/mental capacity) her principles have been lost. I am grateful to Susan Schaeffer Macaulay for bringing this genius back into fashion.

Oh and you can read a more "modern" interpretation of these principles here.

Let's learn something new today. Simply because we can! And were created to do so.

Personally, I love this line: "the chief responsibility which rests on them (children/students) as persons is the acceptance or rejection of ideas." Have you seen TV lately? Or been to the mall? Doesn't it seem that we have lost the ability to reason, to weigh ideas and then make a choice? Do our children even know they have a choice?

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Dating Dia

So my sweet baby has now become the most fun, hippest girl to be around. Rory and I really really like her. As in just like to be with her, be around her, you name it. And this week, we both took the chance to date her.

Thanks to a bout with the stomach flu, Dia and I quarantined ourselves from the world so as to not infect our friends. But by Tuesday, we had to get outta the house! So we spontaneously picked up and headed down to see the ducks at the park in Scottsdale--just the two of us! I am honestly surprised at how often our time together is given over to play dates, exercise, chores, etc. Tuesday was our chance to just hang out as mom and daughter. And she blew me away. We had so much fun at lunch and walking around Old Town Scottsdale, we never even made it to the park. I love my daughter. And Tuesday was kind of like our date!

Dia strolling Old Town...mostly just window shopping :)

We met a kitty-cat in that store and Dia kept wanting to check in on it. She does not know what to think of cats up close. We don't have any so she's always taken aback when she meets one.


Trying to get a better view of the kitty

She loved the wind chimes!

And with each chime, she put her hand to her ear and said, "Huh-ow?" (That's "Hello?") She thought it was a phone ring and is adamant about answering each call! I was laughing so hard. Even at lunch when the restaurant phone would ring she would frantically look about as if to say, "Somebody get that!"

She insisted on getting her bottom directly on top of the blue square. What? Doesn't everyone do that?

Bird-chasing in the grass. Such a beautiful day!



We finished our "date" with an apple juice and muffin at Sola coffee shop. D-O-L-L. I had a blast. Seriously one of the best days ever.

And although Rory has already been on dates with D before (Mom's Night Out for me, violin lessons, etc.), he "picked her up" on Wednesday and took her to their little hot spot--Sauce, it's become a tradition--and topped it off with a trip to the toy store. He is SO that kind of dad! (Pics are slightly blurry--he only had his cell with which to take pics)

At Sauce :) (She seems so grown up!)

Following the other restaurant patrons with her eyes...and arms. She loves people.

At the toy store...checking out a doll house.

Loving on a sweet stuffed animal

Ended up taking this sweet and very loved stuffed puppy home

And of course fed it dinner :)
(That would be shredded chicken from chicken soup in case you were wondering)